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15 Simple Luxuries

There are moments in our lives that seem to speed up when we most want it to slow down and then the moments we want to forget forever that seem to last for decades. Life is not kind nor gentle and it is what lives within ourselves that make the days brighter. Sometimes we forget what the most beautiful parts of our lives are because we are too busy remember how ugly that bigger picture appears. But day to day we are given blessings and wonderful opportunities at great smiles. Here are some of mine just from today:

1. Being able to sleep next to my husband
2. Having two wonderful dogs that are always happy to see me
3. Being able to speak to my friends and family today, even if it is was a quick text to let them know I am thinking of them or vice versa
4. Having the gift of words
5. Being able to afford the Subway I ate today
6. Hearing my husband tell me that he loves me everytime he calls me
7. Having my employees tell me they appreciate me
8. Being lucky for leaving the front window of my house open to be able to climb through it today since I forgot my house keys (i-am-a-ninja)
9. Being able to laugh with my mother
10. Having my husband stare at me as I type this with those oh lala eyes of his
11. Playing angry birds
12. Watching scrubs
13. Having a hot shower
14. Having just enough milk for the cereal I ate
15. Having the freedom to be me.....and getting in trouble for it.

You work hard, you love true, indulge in yourself and accept all that you deserve. Because we all deserve the world.

Au Natural?

PUH-LEEZE!!!

No SUCH thing anymore!

You've got these bad boys...

Full body girdles! Not only does it make you drop 2 dress sizes instantly, it also lifts your butt!

This does not include these two other options:

FOAM BUTT FILLERS!!!!!!!!! WHOOO HOOO!!! There are also butt lift jeans...

How about....

Adds two cup sizes! Miraculous!

And here is the biggest offender of all...

We are talking false lashes, concealer, lip plumper, foundation, etc etc etc.

But ladies and gents.... here is au natural...

Redness, puffy eyes, and you're lucky you can't see what I am wearing! Here are other options...

This "natural" look includes moisturizer, face primer, foundation, concealer, highlighter, blush, 4 different eyeshadow colors, bronzer, liquid eyeliner, mascara, eyeliner, lipstick, lip gloss, pressed powder, powder foundation, finishing spray and a finishing powder....

Writing that almost makes me feel like its not worth it... Here is a lesser look:

This look includes..... powder foundation, 1 eyeshadow, and eyeliner. Better?

And look #3:

Powder, 2 eyeshadows, gloss, and eyeliner. Plus, not so very natural straight hair with curls.

My husband's favorite?

The first one.

It takes about 0 mins to complete.

WHY DO WE DO THIS TO OURSELVES LADIES??????!!!!!

But we love it... yes... oh yes... we DO!

I'm Back!

It has been much too long since you and I have been together and I have missed you. It is an unfortunate truth, indeed, when life and reality intertwines with the whimsical freedom that is writing. It has been a rough start to this New Year but like always strength & inspiration & love triumph. In other words....


I'M BACK BEEEETTTTCCCHHHISSSSS!!!

Valentines Day Polls

The Results!

Is it necessary to give a gift on valentines day?
0% yes its tradition
16% no, it's a waste of money
0% have we been together long?
91% everyday is a little like vday

** Good Answers! I'm surprised more people didn't vote that it was a waste of money. After all, overpriced candy and flowers? But overall, everyday should be a little like valentine's day.

Love Boards, games, cards, dice
45% it could be sexy it adds a fun new twist
9% wack! What, are we in middle school?
36% depends on the game it could be interesting
63% I make my own games (giggity!)

**I loved the diversity in this poll!

Romance
90% necessary element
9% overrated
9% depends on the depth of the relationship
0% only if they romance me first

*I thought this was the most interesting. Romance can vary from so many different things- there is no one definition. You fist must find out what your significant other feels is romantic to them and then blah blah blah- but although this level of intimacy often leaves someone vulnerable, not one person voted only if they romance me first. Nice! Generally, people feel romance is necessary. Some felt it's overrated, and some need to evaluate the relationship first. All fair answers.

Favorite Displays of Affection
90% love letter
20% love text
70% forehead kisses
80% random kiss
80% flirting
80% backrubs
90% holding hands
70% sweet phone call
10% random gifts

**LOVED these results!!! Physical touch always triumphs, but still we love the intimacy of a letter or a phone call. The freedom to express yourself without the touch and still making it mean just as much. WOnderful! I loved that people still feel flirting is considered a display of affection- it's just a short and sweet way of saying everyone wants to feel desired and wanted. My favorite part? Very few felt that random gifts were sufficient displays of affection. Fuck the material, we want the physical baby!


In or Out?
18% Out! I want to enjoy the night with you
45% in! SO many possibilities...
0% Can we just have sex now?
54% All 3 work for me!

** I go with the latter!

Tis better to have Loved and Lost or not Loved at all?
90% Loved and lost
0% not loved at all
9% forget love!
9% depends on the love

** Well, there you have it.

Flavored Body Massages?
36% very sexy!
0% disgusting and sloppy
81% at least find me one that tastes good!
18% whatever, can we have sex now?

**I found this one to be the funniest! SOme people out there just don't care... lets just get it on!

Best Lingerie Texture?
80% silk
20% lace
0% leather
0% mesh

**Ladies! Take the hint! Just because your guys may watch kinky porno with leather bounded whores, doesn't mean he wants you to look like them! lol ANd if it were women who voted, Fellas get the hint! That shit is uncomfortable to wear! You try it! However, I must say I wore a gown this weekend that was silk and mesh and it was very sexy (not to mention absurdly comfortable) Don't underestimate the power of mesh!

Chocolate, flowers, stuffed animals?

70% super cute for any occasion
10% tacky and played out
20% depends on the presentation
0% only for Vday

**I would have to agree with all of them. Crazy, right?! THATS CUZ IM CRAAAZZZAAAYYYYY!!!!

It's Our Anniversary!

March 20th, we made it 2 years being married!!!!!!!! December 20th was 5 years and two of those were of marriage. WOWsers!

To My Husband:

This life, this mortal, tedious, daily strife is nothing short of a wasted projection of tears damped in black and white. And then out of the gift of God- he gives us this treasure, this alternative to bleak reality- and blesses us with colors and inspiration and purpose- and he names it Love.
And as he whispered this concept, this idea, this rare and delicate miracle to the wind- he decided that only those who listened could experience this divine and monumental dream. And for some reason, little ol me, heard the wind beat box to me your name- and instantly- I saw forever.
And here we are- hand in hand, creating rainbows in mid-air and dancing on the trees- because this life we live, it means nothing to me- but with you- all I see is beauty, truth, and endless possibilities.

Happy Anniversary I love you.

Japan

Listen up....

Sending out prayers does not stop the radiation
Giving out your heart does not feed or shelter them
Them being in your thoughts does not help them.

They need CONCRETE AID! If you have seen any of the videos or pictures or are even slightly aware of the terrible nightmare they are living, and will be suffering through for quite some time, PLEASE follow the link below to the different places you can donate to.


http://news.yahoo.com/s/yblog_newsroom/20110311/wl_yblog_newsroom/japan-earthquake-and-tsunami-how-to-help

Imagine your entire life being washed away LITERALLY, or looking for your loved ones for days with no way of knowing if they are still alive, imagine having to explain this tragedy to a younger sibling or child or even worse, trying to erase the images that are now imprinted in their mind.

Most of the donation sites require at least a $10 contribution. I think that is affordable.

If the emotional aspect doesn't get to you then consider this- your donation is tax deductible and the US is in debt to Japan. If their economy shuts down, what do you think that means for us? (if this got to you more than the images I provided...... you're an asshole)

JAPAN NEEDS US!!!!!

How to Understand women

HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Just Kidding!!! There is no such thing!!! HAHAHAHAHA!!!

However, if I had to give a "typical" (what does that even mean?!) guy some advice here are some good tips:

1. I don't care how honest you guys are with each other... NEVER EVER EVER say she looks fat. If she talks bad about herself, suck it up, tell her she's gorgeous and that's it. Repeat 8,000,000,000,000 times.

2. When you make a comment such as "Oh man, I think red is so hot." and we are not wearing red, automatically our ridiculous woman mind says that whatever color we are wearing is NOT hot. Yeah, yeah, I know. But its true.

3. Whether they tell you or not, women love to get put in their place. It shows dominance and masculinity and we will probably rape you at that moment.

4. If she tries something new with her makeup, fashion, hair, etc. Please remember although we realize that unless you are a homosexual you have zero knowledge of how much thought goes into our beauty regime, your opinion weighs heavily on us, so viewer discretion is advised.

5. Don't ever tell us our roots are showing, our eyebrows need plucking, or our legs are prickly. Listen here big guy, reach down and make sure you still have a pair and remember you shouldn't care about anything besides the fact that we are allowing you to have sex with us. Roots cost money and are not fun to administer, eyebrow plucking/waxing is painful, and shaving/waxing our legs and them being smooth lasts all but 1-2 days so if you didn't touch them within that time frame, we are not risking razor bumps for you because then you will notice how red our legs are. (sigh) Get it? Just don't mention it.

I have a vagina and I approve this message.

Religion....Church....Cult...it's like tomato, toe-mato!

The honor code's instructions for living a "chaste and virtuous life" include attending church on a regular basis while abstaining from alcohol, tobacco, tea, coffee, drugs, pornography, gambling, homosexuality, and swearing, as well as premarital sex. "Feelings of attraction" are permitted.-
Rules of a Mormon High School

Clearly..... coffee and tea are eeeevvvilll!!!

Wanna Watch an orgasm???

Yes, that's right!

A College Professor gave a live demonstration for educational purposes in his Sex Ed class of a man using a sex toy on a woman in order to give her an orgasm. The demonstration was optional and students were warned that it was going to be graphic. SAY WHAAAATTT?? Live porn in school?! Hell YEAH!

Of course, controversy erupted. Parents (despite the fact that these are grown ass adults in college) were enraged and even public and school officials that this kind of behavior was permitted.

Forget the crisis in Japan, forget the possible World War 3, forget that Thor is coming out this summer, forget all that important stuff in the world... let's focus on adults in a controlled environment volunteering to watch an educational sexual demonstration. GASP! THE HORROR!

Interesting how we can glamorize and say that "sex sells," to manufacture and sell products, but we can't teach it. America, America, shame on you and your pubescent virginity. We all know your a whore.

What a beautiful thing!

Robot Teachers

South Korea & The Philippines get over 60 Robot teachers to teach them English. The robots read and speak and interact with students with an LCD screen of a Caucasian woman who also sings and dances with the robot moving it's arms and legs. A few things...

1. This is awesome. Way to go technology!

2. Slowly but surely, humans are limiting human interaction and being replaced by machines that are prompted to feel emotions. Can this really compare to a live person teaching?

3. So, I'm pulling the race card here. Why is the woman a Caucasian? This is the "generic" face they choose to portray the English language? Forget the USA, even England has a bunch of different colors...NOT COOL ASIANS! NOT COOL!

Like A G6

.....was recorded and produced in 2 hours and now is a worldwide hit.

Talent, ladies and gentlemen. Pure talent. This was the thought process behind the song:

group member Kev Nish told MTV News. "But Drake, Drake talks about having G4 pilots on deck, so we said, 'What's flyer than a G4?' Of course, it would be a G6"

..........

My thoughts exactly, Peter. Thank you for sharing. But I bet you love that song when it comes on in the club. Damn you.